We all have a love language that speaks to us. The way you want your partner to show love to you may be different see search you to express your love to them.
There are 5 love languages: words of affirmation, good time, physical touch, acts of service, and giving gifts. While it’s nice to have a partner who understands your love language, you have to love yourself in the ways you want, too.
Words of Affirmation
If affirmations are your love language, use daily affirmations. Make a point every day to look in the mirror and praise yourself. Say, out loud, three things you like about yourself. It could be a physical aspect or an aspect of your personality, but whatever it is, speak well of yourself. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to yourself in the mirror, try journaling instead. Write down everything you like about yourself or what you are proud of. Drop your inner critic and thank yourself for once. Tell yourself things like: “You’re doing your best.” or “I’m proud of you.”
Quality Time
Quality time is about giving them your full attention while spending time together. If you’re together, this is self-explanatory, but this is all about spending time with you. If quality time is your love language, set aside time every day you. Take care of yourself, like doing a face mask and watching your favorite movie. Meditate. Go to the gym alone. Be there too. Learn to enjoy your own company.
Acts of Service
Acts of service are those that appreciate a partner who does something for you, often without asking. If acts of service are your love language, do things that are a way of taking care of yourself and your environment. Book that dentist appointment. Do not exceed your treatment time. Wash your dishes, fold your laundry, and sweep the floor. Prepare healthy meals for yourself. Put thought and effort into your space.
Giving Gifts
Gift giving is for those who value the thought and effort of being gifted something you love. If you have your way, treat yourself to something you wanted (or needed). Slather on that perfume or that pair of shoes you’ve been eyeing. Buy a concert ticket. Invest in yourself and your education. Budget that trip you’ve been wanting to plan.
Physical Touch
In a relationship, physical contact is simply about holding hands, hugging, rubbing the back – all soothing and reassuring things. But if you don’t have someone around you, it’s important to love yourself in ways that still achieve that sense of calm. Extend it. Take a hot shower or bath. Do a body scrub or hair mask (don’t forget to massage your scalp!) and moisturize every inch of your body. Masturbate. Give yourself a manicure or facial. Maybe even treat yourself to a day at the spa where a professional massages you or gives you that glowing facial you want so badly.
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When it comes to self-love, it’s important to practice your own love language for yourself. This does not mean that loving yourself is easy, that it does not require dedication and commitment. But you can’t wait for someone to come and love you the way you want or the right way. Sometimes you have to love yourself enough for both of you.